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 Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation

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Safyre
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PostSubject: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   2/24/2010, 4:41 pm

This is posted with permission from an email from a wonderful friend (now member - Sifutimg). It has helped me and I hope it will help you.

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Here is another tool I use to stay clear of negativity. When speaking about judgment, separation, comparison, and attachment, if you have any one of them you will always have all of them.

Example – if you judge something as right or wrong (right and wrong is another discussion) you have attached a belief structure around said judgment and you have done so because to develop a belief structure to attach to you have compared yourself or the something to something else and therefore separated yourself from whatever it is you are judging. I know I know can be confusing but just think about a personal example of something you judge and do some self inquiry about where your belief structure lies and how you got to said belief structure (by way of separation and comparison to some other belief structure as well as value attachments). Judgment seems to be always around some belief structure that we attach to and to many times I have bitten myself in the butt because due to my attachment I have completely missed both gross and subtle details about the something I have attached to and have completely made a fool of myself to friends, family, loved ones, and my kids. Our belief’s can really get wild especially those that have their origins in ego. In other words those belief’s that we cling to and don’t even know why we believe this or that. Most of the time however, we do know why we believe a certain way though and still need to look at that.

The comparison thing really gets us to because our society always compares, you know trying to keep up with the Jones’ and by the way who the heck are the Jones’ anyway? Right?

Then we separate and cling to the duality that this universe is constructed on which can turn into a kind of one pointed-ness. Everything I am studying and experiencing and what I have the most success with is when I don’t separate and look at the oneness of everything and the interdependencies and connectedness of all things. Don’t get me wrong there is plenty that we in fact need to do as individuals but that is mainly enabling ourselves around what our life purpose is and enabling ourselves to be in service. For me and remember I am only ever speaking about MY experience with all this stuff and am no way stating anyone SHOULD do this or that and hope you really get that about me, but for me the more I surrender, accept, allow, and carry myself within a certain type of vulnerability I seem to have the most success being in Love, being a parent, a teacher, a friend, and an individual.

Letting go of fear and ego are definite keys I feel to success with this stuff. Remember that EGO is an acronym for Edging God Out and FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. Maybe you have heard both acronyms. I know what I have just written may take a few reads but just read and contemplate and use your intuition and email me with any questions you may have.





Last edited by Phoenix Rising on 1/1/2011, 7:23 pm; edited 4 times in total
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Avari.Clover

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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   2/24/2010, 9:48 pm

Yes, everything is connected. What bothers me the most in this world is how controlling everyone is. Government, religion, media, family, friends, neighbors...any sort of group has a hierarchy and a control system of some sort. Judgment. Being raised in an environment where if I said I liked something my father did not. He would keep telling me why and would go on and on, even repeating. Forcing what he thought on to me. It bothers me to this day and I shutdown if I have to listen to him.

Other acronyms:
Ego- Emotion growing out-of-control.
Fear- Forget everything and ride.
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/1/2010, 3:08 am

Does he force and repeat, because he is certain that you do not hear? Or does he view you as an extension of himself..."she is of my flesh, my loins and therefor is part of me and must believe/think what I believe/think.?
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/1/2010, 3:08 pm

I agree with everything Avari said and because of those parental, academic, political, religious, spiritual, environmental, and social influences especially in this American culture we live in, I think we get very frustrated and overwhelmed because along with day to day life, we always have to go back and clean up ourselves in a sense when we become older and have more maturity. However I personally believe in divinity. No matter how bad things get for us we still have ourselves. We still have to be us. What does that look like? Each one of us (my personal opinion now) is a reflection of the Godhead and until we shed our sense of lack, self judgment, and self defeating perception our thoughts are tainted in a sense as they go out from our minds and into the Universe adjoining with the collective then magnetizing elements then bringing those elements to our experience.

The tool I shared (judgment, attachment, comparison, separation) that Safyre posted here is really more of a process. I use judgment as the key to alert myself to something I need to look at. I then start contemplating what attachment I have to a belief I may hold. When I am able to identify that I look at the comparison and separation pieces. When one separates or compares attachments form because the “whys” are very strong at this point. The “whys” of judgment and attachment are weighted different as judgment and attachment are more of something that just is and it’s just accepted in our sense of self. When we dig into both comparison and separation we get into a finer set of details in my opinion.

Using this statement and I ask you please forgive my using this as an example but – “What bothers me the most in this world is how controlling everyone is.” I would ask why would you waste your time being bothered by something especially something you don’t have any control over? You see we give our power away and we don’t even realize it. My dad wanted for me this picture in his head about how I should live my life. But his picture is his and he is simply mapping his expectations and perceptions onto me projecting something that can truly be defined as illusion. I am nothing like my dad wanted me to be, but he is still proud of me because I am successful, a dad, a husband and simply a good person.

Anytime we experience that tension when someone is around us and we want to shutdown, that is an opportunity each and every time to choose. We are always at choice. In figuring out and manifesting our life purpose we come across situations close to home to try and push us to set boundaries for ourselves in relation to what serves us to grow I feel. When I look back on certain things I can see where if I just stood my ground and staying in my integrity, not being hurtfull or combative, I see many missed opportunities. I missed them because I didn’t have my current realizations on how to deal with certain situations and know that it’s OK, no regrets.

Dive in and work to understand our own internal compass and what truly makes us happy and in our joy. How can we get to our natural state of being – that is our natural state being is to be in our JOY! Why spend one minute out of our JOY, what is the purpose? Yes things will always come up, use the process and figure it out. After all we own it all- don’t we? I know some believe maybe not and that is OK because everyone is valid in where they are at and it’s perfect – perfectly divine – until the next in breath and out breath wakes us up to our incredibly powerful and beautiful being.

This is what I thought and wrote when I read this thread. Please know these are my opinions and do not mean to tread on anyone else’s belief structure. It‘s just what I intuit and write and apologize if it made anyone uncomfortable as that wasn’t the intention. I don’t get the chance to read hear very often but appreciate everyone’s openness for sure.

Namaste
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/1/2010, 6:27 pm

Jass wrote:
Does he force and repeat, because he is certain that you do not hear? Or does he view you as an extension of himself..."she is of my flesh, my loins and therefor is part of me and must believe/think what I believe/think.?
Both.

Sifutimg: Control disturbs me because my dad was trying to make another being do something that I didn't believe. Especially at an age when I shouldn't have known better but I did because I had my own innate knowledge guiding me.
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/1/2010, 8:08 pm

Avari.Clover wrote:
Jass wrote:
Does he force and repeat, because he is certain that you do not hear? Or does he view you as an extension of himself..."she is of my flesh, my loins and therefor is part of me and must believe/think what I believe/think.?
Both.

Sifutimg: Control disturbs me because my dad was trying to make another being do something that I didn't believe. Especially at an age when I shouldn't have known better but I did because I had my own innate knowledge guiding me.

If both I'd say part of the failing is your own, walls (perhaps needed, perhaps not) instead of true communication. Sad that your father does not recognize the futility of such a course, but that is perhaps the truth of your lament. Force against belief is futility.

@Sif, I think you maybe too esoteric for my pee-brain, which is saying a lot (since I consider myself brighter than the average lightbulb). Judging, comparing, attachment, separation? My instant reaction is so what? I want good judgment, I want to be able to compare and contrast ideas (otherwise what's the point of being here @ sacred fire or any intellectual or spiritual discourse) I want to attach to things and people(isn't that the whole idea behind a connected universe/divinity?) And as I said in the ego thread, I don't think connectedness (is that a word?) happens without recognition of both what is shared and what is separate. So sadly, I'm missing the point.

Nameste, back atcha
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/1/2010, 10:15 pm

For me being on here and discussing perspectives is so that we can discern but not judge view points offered. In doing such we will get to know our authentic selves. The truth and authenticity for me will resonate in me when it presents itself. When it's not true or is new for me I will not feel harmonious internally. When the latter occurs I need to review if I am attached to some beliefs/conditioning or if I am being shown a reflection of a part of myself I don't care for in another. Some times it's an attachment to a belief. When I recognize that, acknowledge it, then let it go, I find myself looking at things a new way, feeling more free and more open. If it's a reflection I again look at it acknowledge it and discern how I feel about it and make an unattached choice in how that will play a part in my life from now on now that I see it. I am grateful and appreciative for lesson or person even though it may have been hard to see myself in them.

I would like to connect with someone, nature, the universe but not attach. Attachment creates dependency to someone or something. In my experience dependency is not inspiring but rather drains creativity in the parties involved. When people can stand on their own that is when they are able to create and celebrate each individual's gifts, uniqueness and the perfection of who they are. For me I like to view the universe as a puzzle and how its so important that each of us recognizes our own piece and beauty. Our piece needs to remain authentic and true because without it the picture just isn't complete. That's how I like to see it.
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/2/2010, 2:08 pm

Thanks for saying I am failing in your opinion.
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/2/2010, 2:15 pm

You're welcome. Anything to be helpful. And there is no need to emphasize that it was my opinion; whose else would it have been?
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/2/2010, 2:59 pm

This forum was created to be a safe place for kids and young adults to find, express and sort themselves and things out. Please keep this in mind when writing your responses.
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PostSubject: Re: Judgment > Attachment > Comparison > Separation   3/3/2010, 8:36 pm

In response Jass – I definitely agree with everything that you have said. I was merely pointing out a process to get to the bottom of things. We are always at choice, always. We live in a dualistic universe that is vibrant and awesome. We have free will where our expressions outwardly of course affect each of us personally and those around us – the whole. I feel this are foundational pieces that support the mentioned process. For me personally I value peace and abundance (not saying you or anyone doesn't) and when I am in this condition, I find that my creative juices get flowing and I seem to be able to create for myself some pretty awesome moments day to day. I have used this process as a tool to try and help me understand better a given issue that seems to hold me back. It can be a powerful process in my experience.

Esoteric? Maybe, but I think everyone can benefit from each other’s point of view and experience. I think Safyre’s forum here is a great vehicle to discuss and share ideas. I do so without an agenda and value everyone’s insight.

Cheers,
Tim

PS-I am sure you absolutely do not have a pee-brain and think connectedness is a great word - Smile
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